Avengers: Age of Undoing
by Samtastic V2.0
Summary: A unique group of super villains, what Fast & Furious thought of Need for Speed, Stephen King's first book done with veggies, an insanely dangerous new reality show, and a hip new boy band sings their top hit. Meanwhile, Nick Fury recruits his new Avengers while the real ones are making Age of Ultron


**Any actual names or likenesses of celebrities are used in a fictitious and parodic manner.**

**Enjoy :)**

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><p><strong>PART 1: AND THAT, KIDS, IS HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER'S MUCH HOTTER SISTER<strong>

In the lab, Scientist Jr. struggled as he was forced to watch the atrocity known only as _Robot Chicken_. A month he had been locked up, and his already fractured mind was slowly beginning to disintegrate. He hoped with his remaining sanity would go his memories, so he wouldn't remember why he hated the show he was forced to watch.

"Bawk Bawk"

SJ turned his head (as best he could, as he was still restrained) and noticed that, standing next to the TVs was Cluckerella, the EX-girlfriend of the Chicken.

"What took you so long?" SJ growled.

"Bawk Bawk," Cluckerella sassed, as she turned the TVs off and freed SJ from his restraints.

"So, my first plan was a bust, thanks to your hubby and my dad. Luckily, any good villain knows to have a backup plan," SJ stated, as the duo fled the castle, "I'll call my contact and talk to him about the new plan. He's probably been waiting to hear from me"

They made it to Cluckerella's car, which was parked a block away from the Scientist's castle, and took off down the road.

"So," SJ began after taking a minute to compose himself, "How's the kid doing?" At this, he rubbed Cluckerella's tummy with his hand, which she smacked away. He glared at her, "Hey, I believe at that bar, YOU picked ME up, not the other way around, honey."

"Bawk," Cluckerella moaned, glaring at her "partner" as they made their way to the motel she was staying at, as SJ used her cell phone to call one of his contacts.

All the while driving down the road, Cluckerella was subconsciously rubbing her tummy with her free wing, thinking about how everything had gone so wrong.

"Do it," SJ said into the phone, "Do it now."

* * *

><p>The <em>MAD<em> newsroom (from season 3), where Seth Green and Matthew Senreich were both bound and gagged under the table, barely out of the cameras' views. The MAD Newsguy strode in and quickly sat down, papers in his hands, ready to begin.

"We interrupt this story with breaking news," MAD NewsGuy stated, "_MAD_, despite being utterly terrible, is back on the air…for one episode that is a crossover with _Robot Chicken_. What happened was this:

Alfred E. Neumann and myself went to this place that guarantees you can get any cancelled show back on the air, no network presidents needed; in fact, it's the only place that can get a cancelled show un-cancelled. In case you are wondering, exactly what you have to do before you can even ask for your show to be revived is…pretty mature, which is why such great shows such as _Danny Phantom_ and _Blue's Clues_ never came back: Danny and Blue weren't old (or mature) enough to do what needed to be done.

Anyway, Alfred and me knew we needed to do whatever it took to get _MAD_ back on the air. Hey, we know this show is terrible, but it's all we've got! Well, there's the magazine, but everyone knows TV is WAAAAAY cooler than books; that's a scientific fact.

So, with no other option, we went to the Orgy…ganic! Organic Center to ask the Fidelio…ler! The Organic Center to ask the Fiddler to revive our show. Sadly, when we got there, the Fideli…Fiddler was dying.

Apparently those…those… #*$%WADS Seth Green and Matthew Senreich had killed everyone after their crap-tacular show, _Robot Chicken_, had been un-cancelled AGAIN. All because they had tried to leave without having more sex…ucation! Sex-Education! So yeah, they killed the one place that can guarantee your show will be un-cancelled!" At this, MAD NewsGuy stopped his discussion and began angrily kicking Seth and Matthew under his desk. Their cries of pain were briefly heard through their gagged mouths. After a minute of kicking, MAD NewsGuy stopped and composed himself before continuing with his news report.

"So yes, the Organics Center is a…Sex-Education class…taught by the Fiddler…where you can get shows un-cancelled. That's believable, right? No need for parents to report us for talking about sex-orgies and Fidelio murders, right? Anyway, it's now gone, so no un-cancelled shows can come back unless their network decides to un-cancel them. And sadly, chances of that happening are slim to none in most cases.

Luckily, a…friend of mine called me up and offered this crossover episode, so here we are.

We now return you to _MAD_, already in…deep trouble for talking about inappropriate things within the first couple minutes of trying to come back. Oh, and in case anyone is wondering, this _MAD_/_Robot Chicken_ episode is definitely not a distraction while an insane super villain tries to take over the world. No siree."

* * *

><p>It was a normal Sunday afternoon in Metrotown, a quiet suburb; a few friends were having a barbecue, where some kids were playing tag, and the sprinklers were on, letting the grass grow.<p>

Of course, Metrotown was also the home of the League of Super Evil, a group of 4 super villains who were plotting to take over the world. Their plan was to take over Metrotown first, and then slowly but surely become overlords of the world. Nothing could stop them!

Except…

"What the…?" Voltar, the diminutive red leader of the group, was reading the paper he had been given, "This says that _League of Super Evil_ has been taken off the air indefinitely, with no plans to air the reruns OR release the show on DVD?! This is an outrage!"

"Well, Voltar," Doktor Frogg, the group's "evil genius", pointed out, "Our show mainly focuses on how a group of inadequate super villains go through everyday life in an attempt to rule the world. Really, we didn't stand a chance."

"No!" Voltar stated, determination in his eyes, "If we can't get our show back on the air, we'll take over the world and FORCE everyone to watch us!"

"But how are we gonna do that," Voltar," Red Menace, the group's dimwitted muscle, asked, "I mean, our initials spell "LOSE" for crying out loud. Not much to work with. Plus, there are only 4 of us."

"Oh, leave that to me, Red Menace," Voltar said, chuckling wildly, "I just need to make a couple phone calls."

_The next day…_

Doktor Frogg, Red Menace, and Doomageddon (the team's doom hound) met down in the basement at exactly 1:37 PM, per Voltar's (unusual) request. They were uneasy at the fact that all the lights were out.

"Gentlemen," Voltar stepped out of the shadows, "It has come to my attention that the League of Super Evil is really nothing but 4 losers. So, to really show the world we mean business…" He paused for dramatic effect, causing his companion's to lean in, wondering what their boss's plan was. "I give you…" he tore down a tarp, uncovering a sign that read…

**ULOSE**

"ULOSE?" Doktor Frogg read the sign, confused.

"It stands for Ultimate League of Super Evil," Voltar explained, "So when the good guys try to stop us, we can tell them," he pointed in front of him, "ULOSE (You Lose)!"

"But why the name change?" Red Menace asked, to which Voltar smiled.

"Glad you asked, Red Menace," Voltar stepped over to the light switch and turned it on, "I give you the rest of ULOSE!"

Each person stepped forward as Voltar introduced them.

"The Toilet-nater from _Codename: Kids Next Door_."

"Prepare to be flushed!" the Toilet-nater cried out, trying (and failing) to sound threatening.

"The Box Ghost from _Danny Phantom_."

"Beware!" the Box Ghost cried out, also failing to get any reaction form the others.

"Dr. Doofensmirtz from _Phineas and Ferb_."

"So, is this a _MAD_ sketch, or a _Robot Chicken_ sketch?" Doof asked, "Because I need to know which inator I can use: the destruct-intor, or the…let's call it a **G**rape-inator for the moment."

"Jack Spicer from _Xiaolin Showdown_. Not _Xiaolin Chronicles_." **[1]**

"Personally, I think they did me and everyone dirty in that poor sequel/spin-off. I mean, _Ben 10 Ultimate Alien_ was an OBVIOUS continuation of _Ben 10 Alien Force_, and it worked. But _Chronicles_ COULD have just been the fourth season of _Showdown_, except the writers wanted to get "creative" and junk," Jack griped.

"Dr. Light from _Teen Titans_."

"I'm all in for this group, as long as…Raven isn't gonna show up," Dr. Light gulped at the thought of the dark Titan.

"Toad from _X-Men Evolution_. There are some versions of this character who are threatening, but not this one."

"Eh," Toad shrugged, "I just like to chill and cause mischief."

"Ferret from _Static Shock_."

"Personally, I like to eat more than I like to be evil. But I look like a freak, so no one can be bothered to accept me, so that led to a life of crime. Hey, someone's got a candy bar on them," the genetically altered teen with the big nose sniffed the air.

"Wile E. Coyote and Elmer Fudd from _Looney Tunes_."

"Be vewy vewy quiet, I'm twying to make myself seem wike a vewy evil viwwain," Elmer followed with his signature chuckle.

Wile E. held up a sign that read, "_Will join evil group for food. Preferably cooked bird._"

Vector Perkins from _Despicable Me_."

"To be fair," Vector grumbled, "I was the main baddie in that movie."

"You're welcome to go back to the moon," Voltar stated warningly.

"Never mind," Vector shut up.

And last but certainly not least, Hector Con Carnie from _Grim and Evil_."

"You know, I had my own show, too. _Evil Con Carnie_. And it barely mentioned that _**other**_ show during its run," Hector stated, venom in his voice as he thought about his "sister" show. His bear-body, Boscov, simply waved happily to everyone.

"You mean the show that ran for six seasons, 3 movies and a crossover special, as opposed to your dinky one season," Voltar asked, rolling his eyes.

"Never mind," Hector begrudgingly shut up.

"So, Voltar," Doktor Frogg spoke up, doubt in his voice "Let me get this straight. Your plan is to use TV's lamest villains to somehow take over the world?"

"How dare you refer to the almighty Box Ghost as lame," came the cry from said ghost, before Voltar could reply, "I shall have you know that many tremble in fear at the mere sight of me!"

"Would you give it a rest?" Ferret spoke up, "We're all here because we're the lamest of the lame, and we're being given a chance to prove ourselves. Personally, I like the odds of us succeeding now, because all our disastrous luck should surely cancel out with each other."

The villains all murmured in agreement, causing the Box Ghost to pout and reluctantly shut up.

"So," Voltar began, "My plan is a simple one: we use a plane to crash into the White House. We'll surely kill the president, which will cause global catastrophe."

"You sure that'll work?" Doktor Frogg asked.

"Well, it's all I got at the moment," Voltar shrugged, before turning to Hector, "Hector, did you bring one of your private jets?"

"Yes," Hector answered, "It's parked out back."

"How exactly did none of us notice a jet in our backyard?" Doktor Frogg asked dryly, as everyone hurried up the stairs and outside.

"Eh, I think it's called a "sight gag" or something like that," Red Menace shrugged.

"So, who's the president again? Is it Obama, or some other made up President?" the Toilet-nater asked as everybody boarded the jet.

"I think it's a fake," Voltar said, taking a piece of paper and reading it over, frowning as he told the others, "It's President Richard Martinez from _Cory in the House_. Jeez loueze, and I thought _Xiaolin Chronicles_ was a terrible spin-off. Well, doesn't matter. Once we do it, everyone will know we mean business." Standing from his seat (shotgun) and turning to face everyone, he shouted "ULOSE!"

"ULOSE!" came the battle cry. Even Boscov and Doomageddon roared in delight.

"Nothing can stop us now!" Voltar stated, happy as he could possibly be.

_10 minutes later…_

Voltar, the only surviving member of ULOSE, stood in the rubble that was once the White House. He was currently using his tablet to watch the trailer for _Olympus Has Fallen_. **[2]**

"Oh, it looks like the helicopter is crashing while attempting to take off. I thought the whole movie was about terrorists crashing a plane into the White House," Voltar actually chuckled, until he remembered what had happened, "I really need to watch the movies I get my plans from.

But on the plus side, the first lady is dead, so the President will obviously be dismayed when he gets back from his last minute business trip. Overall," he paused for a moment, "I'd say this went rather well. Except, ya know, for the fact that my group of evil villains is dead and the FBI will be here shortly to arrest me." Then, a smile popped up on his face as he realized, "I'll go down in history as one of the baddest villains ever! Yes!"

* * *

><p><strong>NICK GAMES BROUGHT YOU <strong>_**NICKTOONS UNITE**_**, FOLLOWED BY A FEW CRAPPY SEQUELS.**

**THE ASYLUM BROUGHT YOU **_**MEGA SHARK VS. GIANT OCTOPUS**_**, FOLLOWED BY A COUPLE CRAPPY SEQUELS.**

**NOW…**

A nice little town on the coast, so serene and peaceful, until…

The town was crushed in a fight between a giant shark and a…dinosaur with yellow skin, brown legs and black feet? This was no ordinary dinosaur, this was something much worse.

Yellow SPONGEY skin, wearing brown pants and black shoes, this terrifying creature was known only as…

SPONGE-OSAURUS REX!

The two giant monsters fought, a sort of…rolling fight. They rolled over many cities in their fight, crushing them and killing hundreds of thousands of people.

"We can't get a hold of Urkel or Gibson, so it looks like the 5 of you are our best shot," President Richard Martinez told the group in front of him, "Will you help us? Will you save our world?"

The leader, Jimmy Neutron, stepped forward; "You have our word, Mr. President."

**PLAY AS YOUR FAVE NICKTOONS IN ONE MORE MEGA ADVENTURE…**

Danny Phantom and Tak are swimming towards Atlantis, where MS and SR are currently having their latest showdown.

**TAGTEAM AGAINST ENEMIES…**

Timmy Turner and Jimmy Neutron are shown battling multiple cyborg-sharks, cyborg-octopuses, and cyborg-dolphins.

**COMPLETE MINI-MISSIONS…**

Patrick Star and Danny Phantom are shown running towards Mr. Krabs, holding both his First Dollar and his Millionth Dollar. They are being pursued by several cyborg-sea-creatures.

**AND SAVE THE WORLD…**

"If the two of them make it to the North Pole," Jimmy read his monitor, "Their massive body heat will melt it and flood the planet!" Patrick, Danny, Tak, and Timmy gasped in horror at this.

**WATCH AS JIMMY, TIMMY, DANNY, PATRICK, AND TAK TAKE ON THEIR GREATEST THREAT YET IN…**

Jimmy and Timmy are shown holding identical harpoons, the only difference being Jimmy's is pink and Timmy's is green. Patrick is in between them, in his Barnacle Boy outfit, holding a jelly-fishing net up high.

Behind them, Danny is holding a "portable cannon" and is wearing a pirate hat. Next to him, Tak, in swimming trunks, is holding his staff up, ready to fight.

Above them is the title…

**NICKTOONS:**

**MEGA SHARK VS. SPONGE-OSAURUS REX**

* * *

><p><strong>FROM STEPHEN CORNCOB COMES A RE-IMAGINING OF ONE OF THE BEST STORIES OF ALL TIME!<strong>

A high school filled with anthropomorphic vegetables. They are all talking and gossiping, with a few of them glaring at one cucumber who is walking down the hallway, alone.

_Everyone thinks I'm weird…_

The cucumber, Larry, made his way to homeroom, uneasy at the glares he was receiving.

_I'm tormented at school by bullies…_

Larry had just finished in his swimming class with the best time, and the teacher congratulated him, causing him to smile.

"Wipe that smile off your face," an onion named Lunt ordered him, glaring darkly at the cucumber.

In the locker room, Larry was thrashing around blindly, having just had a bunch of used condoms dumped on him by his main bullies, two gourd brothers named Jimmy and Jerry. Everyone was laughing and taking pictures with their smart phones.

_My roommate is a religious fanatic who won't accept anything "unholy"…_

"Get in the sink!" Bob ordered, pushing Larry into the sink, "Get in the sink and pray for forgiveness!"

_But recently, I've learned something about myself…_

As the students continued mocking Larry, the lights above them suddenly shattered, engulfing them in darkness.

_I'm different than other veggies…_

"Let me out!" Larry cried, trying (and failing) to climb up the sink. Suddenly, right where Bob was, a crack formed in the sink, chipping it.

_I have these powers…strong powers…_

Back in class, as Larry listened to the teacher drone on and on, he glanced out the window and made the flag on the front lawn blow upright, despite there not being any wind.

_YOU._

"I don't know if you're going to Prom," Laura Carrot said, "But if you are, I'd love to go with you." Larry and Laura smiled at each other.

_WILL._

Junior Asparagus glared at Jimmy and Jerry, "If you two are planning some horrible prank on a sweet, lonely guy like Larry…"

_KNOW._

"They're gonna laugh at you," Bob told him, shaking his head as he watched his roommate make a tuxedo, "They're all gonna laugh at you."

_MY._

Jimmy and Jerry Gourd, Mr. Lunt, and Mr. Nezzer broke into a super market the night before Prom, stealing one item:

A giant bottle of BBQ Suace.

_NAME._

"I give you, Larry and Laura, your Prom King and Queen!"

Larry stood on the stage, smiling at finally being accepted…completely unaware of Jimmy and Jerry Gourd on the rafters above the stage.

"Thank you, thank you," Larry was gladly calling to the clapping students…until he was covered in a brown, sticky substance.

…

Veggies are shown flying through the air all over the gym, all screaming in terror, as the walls are crumbling, the windows and lights are shattering, the decorations are getting thrown all about…

"BARBECUE SAAAAUUUUCE!" Larry screamed out, as he made the rafters collapse, causing Jimmy and Jerry to fall to the stage. They were stopped, though, hovering in midair in front of a VERY angry cucumber who was currently wearing a Prom Crown and was covered in BBQ sauce.

All around them, veggie students and teachers were hopping for their lives as chaos rained down upon them.

…

Bob is shown hurling through the air in the direction of the screen. He screams as he smashes against the screen, his tomato juice dripping to spell…

_**LARRY**_

* * *

><p>In a nice little mansion in LA, Aaron Paul, a (formerly B-list) celebrity who gained fame for his role as Jesse in <em>Breaking Bad<em>, was just waking up and heading downstairs to the kitchen in his robe and slippers. He poured himself a cup of coffee to help himself wake up.

"Ah, that's a good cup a' joe," he said, sipping his coffee as he headed towards the front door to get his paper.

As he opened the front door, he was shocked to see none other than…

"Vin Diesel?" It was a surprise to say the least when Aaron Paul saw Vin Diesal standing on his front doorstep, reading his paper.

"Sup, Aaron?" he asked nonchalantly, not even looking at the other actor as he continued reading the newspaper.

"Um, not much," Aaron replied, confused, "So…what brings you here?"

"Just this," Vin said…as he used a copy of _Need for Speed_ (hidden in the newspaper) to punch Aaron in the face. The force sent Aaron staggering backwards inside his house.

"What the h*ll, man?" he angrily asked as he clutched his face; pulling his hand away, he noticed his nose was bleeding.

"When Hollywood wants to make a movie about a criminal using cars for redemption," Vin began, stomping over to Aaron and smashing the DVD case over his head, "They call ME!" He picked Aaron up and threw him into the kitchen.

Aaron struggled to get up, but Vin was already on him, this time brandishing the boxed set of all 6 _Fast & Furious_ movies, "I don't really appreciate that you took advantage of _F&F7_'s delay to make that crappy movie based on those crappy video games!" At this, Vin started beating Aaron with the boxed set, causing the not-as-fit actor to cry in pain.

_6-and-a-half minutes later…_

"So," Vin was now standing over the severely bruised Aaron Paul, "Let's go over this one last time: Is there going to be another _Need for Speed_ movie?"

"No," Aaron moaned, as he struggled to stay conscience.

"Right," Vin nodded, "If by some chance there is, who are they gonna call to do it?"

"You," Aaron answered, as he coughed up a bit of blood!

"NO!" Vin yelled, slamming the dented beyond repair _F&F_ box set over Aaron's, "They're gonna call you…and have me guest star, officially placing _Need for Speed_ and _Fast & Furious_ in the same universe. Like they did with that _Better Luck Tomorrow_ movie that had the guy who played Han. They made it so that that it was Han's high school life, even though the character had a different name. But it actually works perfectly."

"How d…does it work perfectly?" Aaron struggled to say, as he slowly slipped into unconsciousness.

"Well, Han's name is a rip-off of the _Star Wars_ guy, so having his real name be something different, and Han his nickname makes perfect… HEY!" At this point, Vin noticed Aaron had passed out. He tried shaking him, but that failed to work. Grumbling to himself, Vin grabbed a grocery list notepad from the fridge and wrote a note to Aaron, reminding him not to make another _Need for Speed_ movie unless it crossed over with _Fast and Furious_.

Vin then stole Aaron's toaster and headed back to his own, much larger mansion.

* * *

><p>"Hey folks! It's me, WrestleMania Star, John Cena. I'm hosting this awesome new reality show:<p>

**ROLLER COASTER WARS!**

I'm here at the only amusement park that was willing to spend the 2 million dollars to make my vision come true…"

"WAIT!" the owner the amusement park ran up to Cena, a concerned look on his face, "I thought it was only **one** million dollars!"

"Well, you thought wrong," Cena obliviously brushed him off, "Now, let's meet our contestants…"

Cena walked over to the line to get on the ride/reality show. At the front of the line were two kids who looked to be about 10, one Caucasian with blonde hair, the other African-American with a black hair.

"And what are your names, kiddies?" Cena asked, leaning over the two with a smile on his face.

"I'm Max and this is my buddy, Kevin," the blonde said, excited he was meeting his favorite Wrestler.

"Well, Chuck and Ray," Cena said, completely ignoring what Max had said, "You two are the first two compete on my new show…" He then leaned down and yelled right in the kids' faces:

**"ROLLER COASTER WARS!"**

"Wow, I can't believe John Cena just yelled in our faces," Kevin said giddily, smiling widely.

"So," Cena explained, as he got in between the two and put a hand on their shoulders, leading them to the ride, "The way this works is sorta like a race, with the first one back being the winner." At this, he stopped in front of the two trains, one red, the other blue.

"Man," Max stared in awe at the ride as he climbed in the front the blue train, "Look at all those loop-da-loops. This is gonna be awesome!"

"I know, right?" Kevin agreed, climbing in the front of the red train. More people then filled up the carts behind the two boys.

"Ready?" Cena asked from the control booth.

"YEAH!" everyone cheered, as Cena hit the "GO" button.

The two trains took off at a surprisingly fast speed. All the passengers screamed in excitement.

At first, the ride seemed to be going okay, with the passengers using the fake guns on their seats to fire "lasers" at each other. Max and Kevin were cheering the loudest as they targeted each other.

Back in line, the crowd laughed as they watched the trains "battle" each other.

"You know," one lady said to the man next to her, "I'm surprised that this is actually getting made into a show. I mean, it's cute watching them "fight" each other, but not much is actually happening."

"Eh," the guy shrugged, "They'll put anything on TV these days."

"Hold on, you two," Cena said, suddenly appearing behind them, wrapping an arm around both of their shoulders, "Just wait."

The two trains then appeared to be going to the same turn point (a + type shape with them going perpendicular to each other), but everyone was sure it was just the way the tracks were set that made it look that way. They were wrong.

Max's train managed to make it through the turn first, but the last cart was TORN OFF as Kevin's train zoomed through the turn. The passengers of that cart, an old man and his young granddaughter, went flying through the air and crashed on the ground, both becoming little more than bloody smears on the grass.

"OH MY GOD!" "WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED?" "CALL AN AMBULANCE!"

Cries of shock were heard throughout the platform as they eyes the trains. Because of the impact, Max's train was briefly leaving the tracks in the back. The screams of joy and excitement on the trains were replaced with screams of terror.

"Mr. Cena!" the owner called to the wrestler, "You need to stop the ride! More people might get hurt!"

Cena simply looked at the owner, leaned down towards him, and yelled right in his face,

**"ROLLER COASTER WARS!"**

"What?" the owner said, shocked that Cena didn't seem the least bit worried.

"Let me just take a guess," one woman said to Cena, her voice dull despite her terror at watching the trains, "When someone points out how dangerous this is, you're just gonna scream the show's name at them, aren't you?" a woman asked, to which Cena replied by yelling in her face,

**"ROLLER COATER WARS!"**

"I thought so," she said.

"Wait!" another person yelled out, pointing towards the tracks, "Look at the end!"

Everyone turned, and gasped in shock at what hey were just now noticing: the two tracks shot up, and then came down in a V shape, with only one set of tracks to come back into the station. The single track then broke off into two tracks, which the audience was standing in front of.

"Um…the trains are gonna race for the single track, aren't they?" one man asked, dread in his voice.

"Yup!" Cena answered proudly, "First one to reach the track makes it back here to win!"

"What exactly do they win?" another woman asked, her voice stating she didn't believe the prize would be worth it.

"Gold passes," Cena held one said pass up, surprisingly calm as he explained, "The winners get free admittance for a year, as well as automatic cuts in line." At that, the _WWE_ star slowly began making his way to the stairs to the exit, "I mean, this show is insanely dangerous, so if you survive, you get the ultimate prize."

"Ok," the owner groaned, "This is all news to me."

"Wait," an older gentleman said, everyone following his gaze towards the tracks, "Won't whichever train that doesn't "win the race" just come flying onto the platform, killing everyone on it? And also everyone it crashes in to?"

However, when everyone looked back to Cena, he was already off the stairs and running towards the exit of the amusement park.

"AAAAAHHHHH!" everyone on the trains screamed, as they came down the V shape to the single track. Everyone on the platform began screaming as well as they pushed and shoved their way to the stairs to get away from the imminent threat.

Max and Kevin were both screaming in terror as well, both obviously seeing the single track and realizing that at their current speed, they would crash into each other and go flying onto the platform, possibly even off the platform and into the booths and concession stands.

As they resigned themselves to their fate, they looked at each other one last time and yelled,

"BEST REALITY SHOW EVER!"

…

"We interrupt this sketch with some breaking news," MAD NewsGuy stated, reading his papers, "John Cena is wanted by the FBI for murder and gross misconduct on a terrible reality show. The death toll is at least 50, with over 2 dozen more severely injured. It's so bad, the amusement park that agreed to film the reality show is being forced to close down.

So yeah…a lot of people legally and illegally want John Cena's head at the moment.

We now return you to the _MAD_/_Robot Chicken_ crossover, already in…credibly terrible, as expected."

* * *

><p>"Hey, folks, Chris McLean here, comin' atcha with big news! Since fans really liked <em>Total Drama, Drama, Drama, Drama Island<em> and _Celebrity Manhunt's Total Drama Action Reunion Special_, and have been bummed that no new season has started with an hour-long special, we're bringin' it back for Season 7." **[3]**

"So," Chef said dryly, "We're having another special contest episode, where the "winners" get the chance to compete next season. And yes, we're bringing back everyone from all 3 generations of the cast."

"Everyone except," Chris butted in, "Scarlett and Duncan, because they're still in jail, Zeke, because he's still AWOL and probably still wants to kill me, Mr. Coconut, because he's been promoted to our mascot, and Blaineley, because she sued Fresh TV and got her job back at _Celebrity Manhunt_."

"So we're seriously bringing back She-Hulk Eva, Miss Never-Shuts-Up Staci, Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Idiot Katie & Sadie, Singin' Disney Princess Ella, and Chris Jr. AKA Topher?" Chef asked, disbelieving.

"Eh," Chris shrugged, "They're _Total Drama_ kids, and even though they're beyond annoying, they bring the drama when they interact with the rest of the cast. I mean, Eva still has that unexplained grudge against Bridgette, and that's always a hoot to watch."

"Right," Chef said, no longer caring, "So what are we calling this special?"

"Ahem," Chris cleared his throat and turned back to the camera, "The lucky kids who will get to compete in Season 7 of Total Drama (for another chance at 1,000,000 dollars) are the ones who win…"

**TDVAVPVFVJVMJ**

"Um…what?" Chef asked.

Before Chris could answer, however, the entire Total Drama cast (minus the 5 not competing) was dumped from the Fresh TV jet. They all groaned as they stood up and started conversing with each other.

"EVERYBODY!" Chris shouted, gaining everyone's attention, "Welcome to the Season 7 lead-up. Everyone of you has participated in at least one season of _Total Drama_, and now you all get to compete for the chance to do it again!"

"And why would we want to do that?" Gwen asked, rolling her eyes, "We'll all be humiliated, betrayed, etc, and there's a slight chance we'll lose the money at the end of the season."

"She's got a point," Mike spoke up, "I never got my money after you sank Wawanakwa."

"Also, every place is a bust," Courtney spoke up, "The TD Jumbo Jet got blown up," Chris glared at Sierra, who sheepishly blushed, "Wawanakwa is at the bottom of the ocean," This time Chris glared at Chef, who rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, "And none of us are stupid enough to go to Pahkitew Island after it malfunctioned," Since Scarlett wasn't here, Chris instead glared at Max and Dave, both of whom had had a minor hand in helping the island malfunction.

"You forgot one," Chris said, smirking at the CIT, "The movie lot! This season will take place at the revamped movie studio. And it's also where this special takes place. And it's also where we're at right now."

"OOOOH!" Everyone said, finally looking around and realizing that they were, indeed, at the movie lot from Season 2.

"So, Chris, what's the special challenge that we have to win?" Owen asked excitedly, "And will there be chocolate involved?"

Before Chris could answer, Owen, Katie and Sadie, Jo, Max, Sugar, B, Beardo, Leonard, Amy, and Justin let out screeches of pain and dropped to the ground, where they began thrashing around. Their friends and enemies looked on in horror as little beasts suddenly burst from their stomachs. The creatures hissed at the teens and scurried off.

"Um…What THE F*CK!" Cody screamed in terror.

"Amy!" Sammy screamed, "She was always hateful to me, but…" she paused, "Wait a minute, this is great. My evil sister is dead, so she can't put me down anymore." She smiled at this fact, despite how morbid it was.

"Um, Chris?" Bridgette asked the host, "What's going on?"

"You see, kids, the network understands a lot of you are p*ssed about all the illegal crap this show always does," Chris took a moment to look at Dakotazoid, still a 10-foot-tall monster, "So they figured they would embrace it for this episode…while also getting rid of the majority of you."

The contestants were horrified by this bit off news. Right then, Tyler, Lindsay, Eva, Alejandro, Rodney, Dakotazoid, and Scott suddenly had their heads blown off by three 7-foot-tall monstrous robots with guns.

Sky was about to be shot, too, only for Dave to dive in front of her and take the blast.

"Redeeming sacrifice!" he cried, as his stomach was blown open by the monster.

"Dave!" Sky cried, kneeling beside him.

"Sorry…for bein'…a jerk last season," he muttered, as the life left him. Sky cried…until she too had her head blasted off by the monster's gun.

"So," Bridgette looked fearfully at Chris, "The special, what does it stand for?"

"Well," Chris began…only to have his head blown off as well. Bridgette shrieked in terror as she jumped into Geoff's arms…unaware that his head was being eaten by one of the now 10-foot tall creatures that had burst from the stomachs of her friends.

The moment she realized this, she shrieked again and ran towards Gwen, Harold and Cody, who had their backs to each other as they tried not to freak out and be noticed by the monsters roaming around.

"Okay," Harold began, "Just look up at the title, and we can figure this out."

The foursome looked up at the title, still in midair over the movie lot.

**TDVAVPVFVJVMJ**

"Okay," Cody began, "The TD obviously stands for Total Drama."

"And Chris said that the network wants to get rid of us," Harold added, "So I'm gonna go out on a limb and say all of the V stand for Versus."

"Wait!" Bridgette cried, suddenly getting it, "The way Owen and the other died, it's like the movie _Aliens_."

"Total Drama Versus Aliens Versus…" Harold began, as he looked at the monsters with guns, finally recognizing them, "…Predators Versus…"

"Aaaaah!" The scream came from Beth, who wad suddenly sliced to pieces, as a figure jumped out of her ear. He was burnt and had a gardener's glove on his hand. He then sliced up Shawn, who had been standing right next to Beth when she died.

"…Freddy Versus…" Gwen gulped, as she watched a figure in a hockey mask approach Mike, Zoey, and Cameron from behind. Quickly, he drove a machete in their backs, getting their hearts from behind.

"…Jason Versus…" Cody stopped…"What does the MJ stand for?"

Suddenly, the four of them jerked their necks down twice, as a tone rang out.

"What the…?" Bridgette began, as they jerked their necks again, the tone ringing out once more. Then, another familiar tone rang out, and the entire group, monsters and teens, looked towards the entrance to the studio lot as it burst open.

They again jerked their necks twice as the tone rang out.

"Oh…you are kidding me," Bridgette deadpanned as a hoard of zombies marched into the studio. But they didn't scare her, or any of them for that matter. Because everyone saw HOW the zombies were marching, and noticed a certain zombie in front that was wearing a red jumpsuit.

"Do we have to?" Gwen asked Chef, annoyed, who could only nod his head in regret.

_**'Cause this is thriller, thriller night**_

"…Versus Michael Jackson," Cody groaned, as everyone, teens and monsters, joined in with the zombies and they danced the Thriller, none of them except MJ zombie enjoying it.

_**Thriller, thriller night**_

"So, this summer," Chef stated as he was forced to dance with the teens and monsters, "Find out which of your favorite contestants will compete in Total Drama's 7th season in…"

**TOTAL DRAMA VS. ALIENS VS. PREDATOR VS. FREDDY VS. JASON VS. MICHAEL JACKSON**

* * *

><p>MAD NewsGuy was currently in Michael Moore's booth that he used when he appeared on <em>Robot Chicken<em>. He pulled up a few things on the TV screens before turning to the camera.

"Hello, folks. MAD NewsGuy, here. Um, in a totally random, not made up story, Michael Moore has decided to stop doing his guest appearances on _Robot Chicken_…"

At this, NewsGuy stopped, as a banging was heard coming from the closet a few feet away from him. He quickly ran to the closet, covertly pulled out a handgun, opened the door slightly and put his hand holding the gun inside and fired. The banging stopped.

"That should take care of you, Mr. Moore," MAD NewsGuy muttered, before turning back to the camera, "Anyway, I now bring you…"

**HOW DISNEY MOVIES ****ORIGINALLY**** ENDED!**

"As you know, in _The Incredibles_, in the first few minutes there was a national Super Ban. So…what? The government thinks every villain is like the Joker, that without Batman he has no reason to commit crimes? Well, here's what Brad Bird had in the first draft."

…

"And so, their normal identities should be their ONLY identities." Bob Parr (AKA Mr. Incredible) turned off the TV in disgust. How dare the government tell him that he couldn't be a hero. He saved lives for crying out loud!

"Sweetie?" the voice of his wife, Helen (AKA Elastigirl) called him to the deck of their hotel room, "Don't worry about it. At least the NSA was nice enough to send us all on this extravagant vacation to apologize to us."

"I know," Bob grumbled, wrapping his wife in a hug, "I just can't believe that those idiots in congress think it's a good idea to stop us from doing our jobs."

"I know," Helen said, leaning into him, "Just give it a couple years, a decade at most, and everyone will realize they need us."

"True," Bob said, brightening up, "So, let's go swimming. I could use a dip."

"I still can't believe we have our own island," Helen said, shaking her head in disbelief, "Sure, the name, "Super Party Island", is beyond lame, but otherwise it's a paradise."

"Yeah," Bob said, as he headed to change into his swimming trunks, "This nice place really takes your mind off things."

_BACK ON THE MAINLAND…_

"AAAAAAAAHHHH!"

People screamed and ran for their lives. Everywhere in the country was chaos. With Supers gone, villains had taken to breaking criminals out of prison and letting them run rampant. Many were using stolen weapons to commit multiple crimes.

"NOT THE BLIND ORPHANAGE!" A woman screamed in terror, as Bomb Voyage threw several bombs towards said blind orphanage. It blew up, and several small, charred bodies flew threw the air, landing at people's feet. Many threw up in disgust.

All around the USA, super villains and normal crooks ran rampant, destroying property, killing innocent civilians, and taking over.

The NSA and the Supers weren't aware of this for another two weeks, due to having their own island, complete with their own satellites. Plus, none of them watched the news.

Anyway, by the time they found out, it was too late… Well, they managed to capture many of the criminals, but the death toll was in the millions.

…

"Yeah…" MAD NewsGuy said uncomfortably, as he turned the clip off, "Too violent, obviously, so they basically implied villains were in fact like the Joker, or they were all caught."

He switched to another clip, "So, this next one is from _Princess Protection Program_. Hopefully it won't be as violent."

…

Rosie glared at Brooke and Chelsea.

"So," Chelsea smirked, "Do we have a deal?"

"No," a voice said from behind the two…a bullets blew through their skulls, and they dropped to the ground. Carter and her father, Agent Mason, stood behind the two corpses, both looking disgusted. Agent Mason has a rifle in his hands.

"Wow," Carter shook her head, "I knew Chelsea and Brooke were stupid mean girls, but I never thought they would be stupid enough to go against the government."

"Good thing they were in our house when it happened," Agent Mason said, "Now we can claim defense and clean it up with no one ever knowing." He whipped out his walkie, "I'll call my bosses and tell them to relocate the families."

"Wait," Carter suddenly had a look of thought on her face, "Dad, what did you just say?"

"What?" Mason looked at his daughter with a defensive look on his face, "No one can know about the PPP. We gotta have their parents' minds wiped and relocated to another country with new identities. Protocol."

"No, before that. In our house?"

"Kiddo, they were a threat, and in our house. They were threatening Rosie (even though it was just verbally), so what I jut did constitutes as "Defense of the Third Person". Pretty common knowledge."

"Uh huh," Carter continued thinking, "Is that only in America?"

"I don't believe so. Some countries don't have it "official", but yeah, if someone is an uninvited threat in your home, you have the right to use deadly force to protect yourself and your family if necessary."

"Ok," Carter looked at Rosie, "Rosie, your family owns your castle, right?"

"Yes," Rosie responded, trying not to look at the corpses in front of her, "It's been in our family for generation."

"So it's your _home_?" Carter asked, to which Rosie nodded, "And General Kane is an _uninvited threat_ in your home right now, right?"

Rosie nodded, and both her and gent Mason's eyes went wide as they realized what Carter was suggesting.

"Well," Agent Mason said, "**If** we were to do this, we would need to make sure he was in your home, and someone was in danger at the moment we took him out. Plus, most of the bullets would have to come from your guards." He looked at Rosie, "PPP doesn't need an international incident on our hands. Considering we don't exist."

"Let's do it," Carter smirked.

_LATER, IN THE COSTA LUNA CASTLE…_

"GET BACK HERE!" General Kane shouted, as he chased after Queen Sophia, who had "mysteriously" escaped her prison.

Running past an old suit of armor, Kane grabbed the sword from its grasp and used it to continue his chase.

Then, Sophia "tripped" and Kane advanced on her with the sword.

"You know," he growled, "I was perfectly happy letting you and your daughter rot forever in the dungeon, but now I think I'll kill you, and when I find her, I'll force **her **to marry me and make me king of both countries."

But to Kane's surprise, Sophia actually smirked at him, "That's what you think."

Kane followed her gaze to his chest, where a little red dot was…

BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG

A special shield was dropped on Sophia as gun shots rang out, slaughtering Kane.

"I DON'T WANT HIM ALIVE!" Agent Mason shouted to his men, "TAKE HIM OUT!"

After 10 minutes, Kane was no more than a bloody pulp. Costa Luna was saved.

…

"Okay," MAD Newsguy said in disgust, "I'm done. I work with _MAD_, the kid's magazine. _Robot Chicken_ is too much for me."

At that, he turned all the monitors off and stormed out.

* * *

><p>A white background. All snow. It is clearly a massive snowstorm.<p>

**FROM THAT GUY WHO BROUGHT US **_**FAMILY GUY**_**, **_**AMERICAN DAD**_**, AND **_**TED**_**, COMES THE SEQUEL THAT WE'VE ALL BEEN…WELL, DREADING!**

Albert Stark (_Seth McFarlane_) comes running across the screen. He is still wearing his cowboy hat, but his clothes are, thankfully for him, more winter friendly, with a parka, thick jeans, gloves, and snow boots. It is suddenly revealed that a group of penguins is chasing him. They are crying loudly, obviously with intent to hurt Stark.

_**A BILLION WAYS TO DIE IN THE SOUTH**_

* * *

><p><em>1850…<em>

A black man dressed in fine clothing ran down a street, perused by an older white gentleman. They were on a side road lined with a few houses; it was mostly deserted at the moment.

"You!" the older white gentleman, a slave owner, called out to a younger white man also dressed in fine clothing who was a few houses ahead of the black man, "I'm a slave owner from the south. I've come up north looking for a runaway slave, and without any proof, I'm claiming that young man running towards you is my slave. Capture him for me or I shall see to it you are penalized, as is the law in the mid-19th century!"

However, the younger white man let the black man keep running. When the older slave owner caught up to him, he glared at the younger gentleman, "See here, I shall take your name, your place of living, and your place of work, and over these next few months, I shall see to it that you lose everything."

"Or…" the younger gentleman began…as he whipped out a knife and plunged it into the older man's stomach, "I can kill and rob you, claim I actually saw a slave do it, and be only slightly reprimanded for trying to save you instead of capturing the slave." At this, he reached into the slave owners pocket. "Ooh, a nice little bag of coins. Thank you!"

Slowly, the old slave owner's eyes drained of life as his face lost all color. The younger gentleman laid him down and smirked to himself as he placed the bag of coins into his pocket and used his shirt to wipe the knife off, before placing it back in his pocket. He glared at the corpse; "Interrupt my day to help you, threaten me if I don't, and more-than-likely severely reprimand me if I fail? Yeah, I don't really see that happening."

SLAVERY: SOME SERIOUSLY CRAPPY LAWS BACK THEN, EVEN FOR THE WHITE GUYS! **[4]**

* * *

><p>First there was "The Simpsons Guy," then "Simpsorama." Next year, get ready for a bunch more Simpsons crossovers that we really don't need, but will surely love anyway:<p>

**Simpsons of the Hill**

Hank Hill, Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa, and Maggie are standing in front of the Hill fence, doing noting but standing there, drinking drinks.

"suck,suck,suck,suck,suck,suck,suck,suck,suck,suck," Maggie sucked her pacifier repeatedly, before taking it out of her mouth and saying, in Boomhaur's voice, "Dang ol', tell ya what!"

…

**SpongeBob SimpsonsPants**

"WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE UNDER THE SEA?" Captain Picture's voice rang out.

"SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!" the kid's excitedly answered.

SpongBob exited his pineapple in his tighty whities, as usual. However, instead of a hand placing his pants on him, Homer's hands reached down and grabbed the pineapple, plucking it from the ground.

"HEY!" SpongeBob cried, as Homer began eating his pineapple home, getting blisters on his mouth due to not cutting it up before eating it. Of course, this did not phase him as he simply continued eating the pineapple (Gary managed to jump from it at the last moment).

"Great, now I need a new pineapple," SpongeBob moaned, before he instantly brightened up, "Or maybe I can stay with Squidward."

"NO!" Squidward shouted from off-screen.

"Barnacles," SpongBob muttered.

…

**Simpsons Clues**

Homer jumped in the screen, wearing a green-striped shirt and khaki pants. He was holding a notebook with a picture of a chair on it. He began singing and dancing around.

"WE GOTTA FIND A PACIFIER, THAT'S THE FIRST CLUE. WE PUT IT IN OUR NOTEBOOK CAUSE THEY'RE WHOSE CLUES? MAGGIE'S CLUES!"

Maggie, now a little blue dog, jumped around Homer as he continued singing and dancing.

"WE GOTTA FIND A SAXAPHONE, THAT'S THE SECOND CLUE. WE PUT IT IN OUR NOTEBOOK CAUSE THEY'RE WHOSE CLUES? LISA'S CLUES!"

Lisa, now a little magenta dog with glasses, hopped around Homer as he continued singing.

"WE GOTTA FIND A SLINGSHOT, THAT'S THE FINAL CLUE. WE PUT IT IN OUR NOTEBOOK CAUSE THEY'RE WHOSE CLUES? BART'S CLUES!"

Bart, now a periwinkle cat, hopped in and also danced around Homer as he finished the song.

"SIMPSONS CLUES, SIMPSONS CLUES! WHOSE CLUES? SIMPSONS CLUES!

"WAIT!" Bart interrupted, "How come Lisa's a dog and I'm a cat? It's pretty common knowledge that I'm a dog person and she's a cat person."

"Magenta is a girl dog," Lisa answered, "Periwinkle is a male cat. Would you like to be a girl dog instead?" Lisa smirked at her brother, who groaned in irritation.

…

**Simpsons 10**

"IT STARTED WHEN AN ALIEN DEVICE DID WHAT IT DID!

IT STUCK ITSELF UPON HIS WRIST, THE SECRETS THAT IT HID!

NOW HE'S GOT SUPER POWERS HE'S NO ORDINARY FAT BALD GUY,

HE'S HOMER 10!"

Homer is shown dressed like Ben from the original series, while Bart, dressed like 16-year-old Ben 10 stands nearby. Both have their respective Omnitrixes ready to go.

Next to them, Marge is dressed like 16-year-old Gwen, with the red dress-shirt and black skirt, while Lisa is dressed like 10-year-old Lucky Girl. Maggie is in Marge's arms, dressed in a black t-shirt like Kevin.

"Well," Bart groaned, "This is happening now."

* * *

><p>In a college classroom, Gary the <em>Robot Chicken<em> Nerd was sitting at his desk in the middle of the room. Instead of listening to his boring teacher, he was reading an issue of MAD Magazine.

"Boy," he muttered to himself, "I wish I could meet Alfred E. Neuman and have some hilarious, nonsensical parody adventures with him." He yawned, "That would be so cool. So cool…" Without even realizing it, Gary began to drift off…

* * *

><p>The MAD NewsGuy stood outside a concert hall, specifically near the entrance to Back Stage. He gulped as he approached the "bouncer", who was really just young girl, no older than 10 or 11. She had red hair, wore a black suit with a number 86 on the front pocket, dark sunglasses, and spoke with a Scottish accent as she asked, "Can I help you, laddy?" in a voice that said she was not to be annoyed.<p>

"Um…" MAD NewsGuy gulped, cowering under the girl's glare, despite the fact that he was twice as tall as her, "I'm from MAD, and I'm here to interview the band."

"Oh, are you, now?" she asked in a sarcastic tone, as she rolled her eyes.

"Y…yes," MAD NewsGuy gulped, "I have an appointment."

"Mandy," the girl started speaking into a headset, which was completely hidden underneath her hair, "We got anything about an interview with that crap-tacular Kiddie magazine, MAD?" She listened as the person on the other end said something. "Got it." She then turned back to MAD NewsGuy, "Well, lucky you. You ARE on the list. Follow this hallway down to their dressing room and wait for them there. Their concert is about done, so you'll have a few minutes to interview them."

"Thank you, ma'am," MAD NewsGuy stated, beginning to move forward, only for the girl to block his way.

"Ey, do I look like a "ma'am" to you? I ain't 40-years-old. The name is Numbah 86, got it?"

"Yes, ma'am…er, Numbah 86. I got it, loud & clear," MAD NewsGuy gulped, as he headed through the door and down the hall towards the band's dressing room, wanting to get away from the hotheaded red head as fast as possible.

As he was heading towards the dressing room, MAD NewsGuy couldn't help but notice that the hallway to the stage was unguarded. Knowing this could be his big chance, he took his handheld camera out of his pocket and tiptoed to the wings. There, he could see the band getting ready to perform a song.

Positioning his camera in his hand to get the best view, he looked at the banner above the band members:

**NUMBAH ONE DIRECTION**

He then took a moment to look at the individual band members, all dressed in white, stylish clothing:

The two shortest members were in the back, at the end of the "V" shape, a little purple dog and a boy with red hair and glasses. Courage the Cowardly Dog and Dexter, Boy Genius.

In the second row was a skeleton and a buff, blonde Elvis-wannabe. The Grim Reaper and Johnny Bravo.

In the front was the leader of the band, a bald kid with sunglasses. Nigel Uno, AKA Numbah One of the KND.

"ALRIGHT!" Numbah One shouted, "EVERYBODY READY FOR ONE LAST SONG?"

"YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHH!" the audience cheered out.

"HIT IT!" Numbah One told the instrumentalists.

A guitar riff broke out, and the band members began their dance moves to go with their singing. They were going to sing their hit single, "What Makes Me Numbah One!"

**[GRIM]  
>You're rebellious,<br>Makin' a fuss,  
>You make me and my friends want to cu-u-uss,<br>Don't need back sass,  
>You're such an ass,<br>Being the way that you are is more than enough**

**[COURAGE]**  
><strong>Everyone else in the room can see it,<strong>  
><strong>Everyone else but you!<strong>

**[ALL]  
>Baby I lead up your team like nobody else,<br>The way that I am in charge gets everyone overwhelmed,  
>But when you disobey me it ain't hard to tell,<br>You don't know, Oh oh,  
>You don't know I'm Numbah One,<br>If only you saw what they can see,  
>You'll understand why I hate you so desperately,<br>Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe,  
>You don't know, Oh oh,<br>You don't know I'm Numbah One,  
>Oh oh,<strong>

**[NUMBAH ONE]  
>That's what makes me Numbah One!<strong>

**[DEXTER]**  
><strong>So dude come on,<strong>  
><strong>You got it wrong,<strong>  
><strong>To prove I'm right,<strong>  
><strong>I put it in a so-o-ong,<strong>  
><strong>I don't know why,<strong>  
><strong>You're being sly,<strong>  
><strong>And turn around when I look right in your eye eye eyes,<strong>

**[COURAGE]  
>Everyone else in the room can see it,<br>Everyone else but you,**

**[ALL]  
>Baby I lead up your team like nobody else,<br>The way that I am in charge gets everyone overwhelmed,  
>But when you disobey me it ain't hard to tell,<br>You don't know, Oh oh,  
>You don't know I'm Numbah One,<br>If only you saw what they can see,  
>You'll understand why I hate you so desperately,<br>Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe,  
>You don't know, Oh oh,<br>You don't know I'm Numbah One,  
>Oh oh,<strong>

**[NUMBAH ONE]**  
><strong>That's what makes me Numbah One!<strong>

**[ALL]  
>Na Na Na Na Na Na Num bah One<br>Na Na Na Na Num bah One [x2]**

**[JOHNNY]  
>Baby I lead up your team like nobody else,<br>The way that I am in charge gets everyone overwhelmed,  
>But when you disobey me it ain't hard to tell,<strong>

**[NUMBAH ONE]  
>You don't know, Oh oh,<br>You don't know I'm Numbah One,**

**[ALL]  
>Baby I lead up your team like nobody else,<br>The way that I am in charge gets everyone overwhelmed,  
>But when you disobey me it ain't hard to tell,<br>You don't know, Oh oh,  
>You don't know I'm Numbah One,<br>If only you saw what they can see,  
>You'll understand why I hate you so desperately,<br>Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe,  
>You don't know, Oh oh,<br>You don't know I'm Numbah One,  
>Oh oh,<br>You don't know I'm Numbah One,  
>Oh oh,<strong>

**[NUMBAH ONE]  
>That's what makes me Numbah One! [5]<strong>

The audience went wild, and the band took this time to do several bows and waves to all their fans. MAD NewsGuy took this time to sneak away to the band's dressing room so he could do their scheduled interview. He stopped a moment to put his (still on) camera back in his pocket, since recording a concert is (technically) illegal.

Finally, he got to the dressing room. He knocked on the door, and a "Come in," was heard (though it was not in the least bit inviting). He opened the door and was shocked to see…

"Former President Mandy?" Indeed, there, on the couch, was the former President of the United States and one of the title characters from _The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy_, Mandy. She was still wearing her suit from when she was President (with the mismatched flowery tie) but she also had a pair of sunglasses on her head.

"Yup, that's me," she said dully, "So, the band should be finished signing autographs and dealing with fangirls in a few minutes, so you'll have half-an-hour to interview them before they have to go to the big after party. Got it?"

"Yes, ma'am," MAD NewsGuy nodded, getting out his camera and acting like he was turning it on, "Since we've got a moment, can I ask you, why did you stop being President?"

"Eh, too many assassination attempts," Mandy shrugged.

"Oh, dang, must not have looked good to be scared out of office," MAD NewsGuy remarked as he turned his camera on…and instantly gulped when he saw the fierce glare that Mandy sent him as she jumped up and stormed her way over towards him.

"Alright, let's get something straight, buddy" she growled, grabbing his tie and pulling him down to her level, "I did NOT get scared out of office. I just mean it got annoying to constantly have to kill these nutjobs who, we all know, were hired by my superiors because I was actually doing a good job at running the country and, over all, the world. So, I resigned and let my vice-president, Obama, take over. And then, once I found out my, for lack of a better word, best friend Grim joined this band, I took over as their manager and took them to the top. So, I left willingly to avoid annoyances, and now I'm still top dog. Got it?"

MAD NewsGuy whimpered and nodded as the band entered the room, each cheering and congratulating one another. Mandy let go of MAD NewsGuy's tie and told him, "Half-an-hour" before leaving with a "Good job, guys."

"Whoa, Momma!" Johnny Bravo said, "That was one, wild concert. All those pretty babes shouting my name."

"Easy Johnny," said Courage, "They were shouting ALL our names. I Especially heard a bunch shouting "Dexter" over and over. Pretty cool, huh, Dex?" He said this last part slyly while glancing over at said boy genius.

"What?" Dexter asked, having zoned out while he threw his lab coat on, "Oh, yeah," he said, hearing what his dog friend was saying, "Well, Courage, girls love the nerdy guys. It's a thing now."

"Not as much as they love the dark and creepy guys," Grim countered, "And what's more creepy than the Grim Reaper?"

"We ALL did great tonight, and the fans love each of us," Numbah One told the others, "We got a lot to be proud of. So, let's relax for a bit, and then head to the after party!"

"Ahem!" MAD NewsGuy cleared his throat to get their attention, "I don't mean to interrupt, but I'm with MAD magazine, and I'm here to interview you guys."

"Oh, right," Numbah One said, "Sorry I almost forgot. Well…just ask away, then." He and the plopped down on the couch, while MAD NewsGuy took to the chair across from them.

"Ok," MAD NewsGuy shrugged, checking to make sure his camera was on before beginning, "So, you guys are the top new boy band right now…how does that feel?"

"Well, Numbah One began, "It's pretty great. I mean, we're at the top, but we're still close to the ground, to our roots. We're still tight with all our old friends."

At that moment, the door to the dressing room opened; it was Hoagie Gilligan, AKA Numbah Two of the Kids Next Door.

"Here's your water, guys," he said, handing each band member a bottle of water.

"Thanks, Hank," Numbah One said, not even bothering to look at his old friend.

"It's Hoagie" Numbah Two replied dryly.

"What?" Numbah One asked, not really listening, "No thanks, not really in the mood for a sandwich. There'll be pizza at the after party." He didn't notice as Numbah Two glared at him before stomping out. "So what was I saying? Oh yeah, we're still close to our old friends, all like a big happy family."

_25 minutes of fame-obsessed boy band talking later…_

As the band left to go to the after party, MAD NewsGuy turned to the camera one last time; "And there you have it, folks. The hip new boy band, Numbah One Direction, singing their hit single and giving you a little look at their personal lives. You saw it here on _MAD_." He then set the camera down and muttered to himself, "No wonder this show got cancelled."

* * *

><p>Nick Fury was seething mad as he looked at the broadcast on his television. New York was under attack AGAIN! And by the looks of it, it was by another race of Chitauri. Oh, and even better was that this time they were being controlled by that little turd who had kidnapped all the still-living Presidents a couple weeks ago.<p>

Whipping out his cell phone, he called his contact. Once his call went through, he started in, "I don't know, sir. This is completely unexpected." He listened. "I understand, sir. Should we call in the Avengers?"

His contact reminded him why he couldn't do that: "Oh, right. _Age of Ultron_. Well, what about the X-Men? The Guardians of the Galaxy? The Justice League? The Teen Titans? The Incredibles? The Thundermans? The Men In Black? Ben 10? Danny Phantom? The Toy Story gang? Well, who **isn't** busy and/or retired at the moment?"

His face grew grim as his contact told him of his only option. Without replying, Fury snapped his cell phone shut and turned his TV off, before heading to his car. He typed "Pastryville" into his GPS and took off. It was time to bring in the Z team.

After about an hour of driving, Fury reached the countryside, where Pastryville was located. Oddly enough, he saw smoke coming from the distance. As he continued driving through the forest, he saw her walking away from where the smoke was coming from. The first member of the team. The blonde gal with a MAJOR attitude. He pulled up in front of her.

"Bitch Puddin'," Fury said, looking at the former Pastryville resident with a VERY serious face, "You have become part of a larger universe.

Of course, after pondering what Fury had said for about 2 seconds, Bitch Puddin' simply yanked him out of the driver's seat, punched him in the face about 20 times, hopped into his car, shouted her "DUN DUN DUN DUUUUNNN! BLAM!" and drove off.

"What a bitch," Fury groaned as he watched her drive away…for about 5 seconds before he reached into his jacket, took out a button, and pressed it. In just a few seconds, Fury's car returned to him.

BP was trapped in a straight jacket that had been built into Fury's car seat, and when he pressed the button, it released itself and wrapped around her entire body.

"Don't think so, honey," Fury smirked, as he tossed Bitch Pudding into the back seat and drove off to pick up the others…

* * *

><p><strong>There ya go, Part 1. I'll get Part 2 up when I can, but it may be a little while because I want to focus on a few of my other stories.<strong>

**Yes, the ending is taken from "The Robot Chicken Bitch Puddin' Special" just because I thought it was great. And Scientis Jr. was first introduced in the Season 7 finale, Chipotle Miserables.**

**As previously stated in chapter 1 of Diary of a Wimpy Hero, I will write/publish 50,00 words of FanFiction for National Novel Writing Month (which is November). So, Chapter word count (not counting AN): 10,655 out of 50,000.**

**Total Word count: 12,182 out of 50,000**

**[1] I didn't watch more than the first few minutes of **_**Xiaolin Chronicles**_** before I turned it off in disgust! Seriously? I mean, is it a sequel or a spin-off? At least **_**Suite Life on Deck**_** changed the location!**

**[2] Wanted to have more, but kinda just got to be a mention. Watch the trailer, and you'll see the scene. I honestly thought someone crashed a plane into the White House before I actually saw the movie**

**[3] I know they say **_**All Stars**_** and **_**Pahkitew Island**_** both count as Season 5, but I don't think that makes a whole lot of sense. So, because I can, I'm counting **_**PI**_** as Season 6.**

**[4] I'm not a huge history nerd, but from what I know, that is how laws were like for whites in the north before Lincoln FULLY abolished slavery: you could be out enjoying your day, and if another white person suddenly ordered you to help catch a slave, you were required to drop what you were doing and comply. I always wondered if anyone simply fought back right there on the spot. Maybe they did, who knows?  
><strong>

**[5] Yes, I'm well aware that I just copy and pasted "What Makes You beautiful" and changed some things up to make it a truly terrible song. So what? It's funny.**

**Anyway, read and review :)**


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